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How Many Shades of Green ?

As every year there are most philosophical questions discussed at the annual EWoT-Meeting. Seeing the gathering of excellent thinkers (and drinkers) it only seems a natural conclusion to be drawn. So, after having been spending several evenings to discuss the deeper meanin of smoked sheep and those specially in combination with Australian farmers and high grass, this year's topic seemed to present itself:

Ireland being the "Emerald Island", how many shades of green are there?

Under the combined efforts of the participants we managed though to solve this puzzle of centuries the question that has been tormenting poets and artists alike!

  The first field research was little promising the first real sight of Ireland was a cloud-shrouded and rapidly darkening. So there could only be seen different shades of black mainly. Nevertheless, the evening was not a complete loss, seeing that Yorrick contributed a first shade of green wearing a green jacket and immediately upon our arrival at Multyfarnham added a second shade of green by means of his Martini bottle which soon was joined by my dark green wine bottles on the white window sill.

  The next day actually was the first worth mentioning in the quest for the shades of green. On a field trip to Mullingar we encountered our confrontation with the shades of green, stretching out over the soft rolling hills. Light green meadows dotted with the occasional white sheep, peppermint green bushes and dark green trees shades of green all over the place! Therefore the most philosophical remark to be repeated on several occasions during the EWoT-sojourn was forged:" It is pretty green there, actually!"

  We could fortify those first impressions and observations on the way back from our excessive shopping spree. More shades of green were observed there in the vegetable aisle, picking up leek and peppers for the evening gourmet dinner upon which we would exchange our philosophical musings of the day's "crops" of  epistemological realizations. Still to discuss although is the matter of taking into count the rather paling look of the cashier and the girl at the packing table as new shades of green upon seeing the provisions we had gathered.

The evening itself, besides the most stimulating discussion and battles of thesis and antithesis, added more shades of green to our list. Most instructive were our observations in regards to the changes that some shades of green were experiencing during the evening. It was commonly acknowledged that with a continuous shrinkage of liquid content the green of the container was taking on a lighter and more translucent shade of green. It remained a mystery thought for a wile as to what may possibly cause the shrinkage of beverage stocks that should keep us on our toes for another day or two before even this puzzle could be solved.

The next day unfortunately had to be ticked off at a loss or so it seemed anyway. The shades of green of the surrounding peaceful landscape had turned into shades of grey under a cover of drizzling rain. Not allowing the dedicated EWoTers though to let this stop them we added another serious day of studying the strange happenings related to beverage shrinkage and set our minds on this stunning phenomenon to later come up with the answer: Those drinks were melting!

To accomplish more thorough examinations we then sacrificed ourselves to a gravely consuming trip to Dublin, our main aim there being the study of Shades of Green in the literature of mostly contemporary authors and craftsmen. A stunning amount of enthusiasm and self-sacrifice made it possible to turn the day into a success. And so we could add another shade of green to our list: The colour of a 10 punts note (lovingly called "tenner" by the locals), changing hands over the counter of a book shop. The ultimate shade of green that day though was added in form of rather short and slightly suggestive velvety dresses by the dancing lovelies at the Arlington Hotel, where we gathered our strength for the long way back.

To confirm our observations about the greenery of the surrounding country side we repeated our trip to Mullingar again this time though widening our field-research to the there present off-license store. We were too much fascinated with the changing of the shades of those lovely glass containers holding the delights of our long philosophical discussions, namely spirits (*winks* yeah, I KNOW that spirit and spirits are not the same) to allow our research party to run out of study material. This evening, with reinforced fervour and determination, we set again to the task of unveiling the secret of the changing shades as the beverages were slowly (or not so slowly) melting away and the fire was crackling peacefully. In educated and well mannered fashion we exchanged our opinions about the last few days' occurrences, benevolent teasing and witty, educated humour in a frivolous way getting the better of us eventually. 

With particular commitment Falkon supported our quest during the following day. In an unrivalled act of self-immolation he dived into the research and came up with the most surprising, most fascinating and most stunning revelations.

First donning a delicately lime-green bed sheet as a rather fashionable and becomingly dress, he even went further in his explorations, outlining his slightly changing facial colour of embarrassment-green with a touch of red lipstick and black earrings, as well as a set of matching necklace and bracelet, although said bracelet was to be worn by his leash-holder Ulrica. After putting his lime-green dress in direct contrast to the meadow-green right outside the house he obviously felt inspired, or rather urged, to deepen his greenness on account  of the survey cause. This was accomplished by imbibing more of a local distillate of a soft amber glow. After parting with his lovely lime-coloured dress (and thus with his female side) he then, giving his total self to our research cause,  took on a few more shades of green, not possible to describe any closer, before finally collapsing on the couch. In the name of research and science. I at this point want to thank Falkon for his selfless commitment to our cause!

A last throwing in of forces was attempted towards the end of the gathering by means of extended travels again. Discovering the shades of green around Athlone Castle as well as the Shannon river we had to bend though to the inevitable the running out of the so much fascinating and desired green walled, sparkling and changing glass containers. And no further scientific research in this field could be done

After this discouraging and devastating tragedy nothing remained to be done but the clearing out of research head quarters and leaving again the last shade of green for me the last view down on the emerald island where we had spent a most enjoyable and educational week.

Although the official number of shades of green for Ireland is 40, I do not hesitate to declare that just by our stay there we may have easily added another 20. Thus I declare our this year's meeting successfully closed. I am very happy to announce that of course from now on we will accept registration for next years meeting the topic will be related to all parties interested in due time!